Temper, temper, sugar, sugar *

“Who ate it all? My one treat at the end of the day. You know it’s mine. Why did you eat it?” The vortex of anguish was accompanied by the freezer door opening and closing, opening and closing as I looked inside again and again in disbelief. Anguish escalated to anger. I’ve got a sugar-coated monkey on my back.

The kids know the signs – slightly jerky movements, the voice edging an octave higher, words tumbling out too fast. She’s gonna blow! They retreat from the kitchen, seeking safety behind the dining room table. And they watch.

It’s a habit, this dish of ice cream after dinner. A very small bowl of vanilla flecked creaminess to satisfy my need for something sweet. I use a tiny spoon to prolong the pleasure. I tease each minuscule morsel gently from the spoon with my eager tongue. It’s the tip, you know, that has the most intense sensation. The cluster of buds that bring joy, that satisfy the jarred nerves, that brings release from the grip of desire. I pause between loads to let the sugar delivered in this luxurious format reach my pleasure centre – the sweet spot.

“Yes, yes, yes. So good. Another little spoonful. Mmm. Better. Again, please. Not too fast now. Easy, easy. Don’t rush. Nice . And. Slow. Ahhh. Yes. That’s it. Right there. Stop! Ohhh, yeeesss.”

Truly, this is proof that size doesn’t matter. It’s all about technique. A tablespoon would be overwhelming and possibly painful. You know – brain-freeze. Small, delicately dispensed is far more effective in the end.

But back to the drama. An ugly scene was saved by the revelation of a secret. It was shocking at first but being an addict, I quickly turned it to my advantage. You see, my husband, also an addict but one who doesn’t acknowledge his affliction, had a stash. A shoe box of mixed chocolate delights stowed beneath his tower of Lycra t-shirts and spandex bike pants. A veritable no-woman’s land of fitness apparel. And since he lives with four women his cache was safe. That is it WAS safe until one of the teens found evidence. A discarded Smarties box in the bathroom garbage bin.

“Dad! You have candy and you didn’t share!” There’s no scold like a teen scold. A wannabe, trained by the master – her mother.

At the shriek of the word “candy”, feet pounded up the stairs – mine and the other kids – rushing to confront the cunning concealer.

Truffles

He whinnied out nervous laughter and snorted his defence. “I was helping mom, keeping the sugar away from her”.

“But what about us, Dad?”

“You guys can’t keep a secret. Next thing you know, mom would be mad at ME for keeping sweets in the house, accusing me of tempting her.”

We demanded our share. (I withheld my wagging tongue.) He capitulated and we were all spared the horrible spiraling out of control of sugar withdrawal.

The tub of ice cream is now securely hidden behind the frozen peas, the ones that have been in the freezer since 2007. My supply is safe.


*This is a Sue Redo from a previous (now dead – RIP) blog.

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22 thoughts on “Temper, temper, sugar, sugar *

  1. Bruce Goodman August 25, 2015 / 11:37 pm

    My freezer is packed with untouched cartons of ice cream. This posting was delightful. Although I’d keep a close watch for finger marks in the beneath-the-peas ice cream. I think I’ll have some ice cream tonight!

    Like

    • redosue August 26, 2015 / 6:57 am

      How CAN you do that? The temptation would be overwhelming for me!

      Liked by 1 person

      • Bruce Goodman August 26, 2015 / 1:41 pm

        It’s quite simple; I’m not that fond of ice cream!

        Like

  2. Cynthia Jobin August 26, 2015 / 12:16 am

    So terribly sensuous you are, here, about your ice cream. I would say it’s really HOT, except that it’s…..well….ice cream. When it comes to sweets, I love the excellent, extremely sweet in very small quantities; large servings of tiramisu or huge pieces of pie are overkill, in my book, especially after a meal. So I enjoyed your small bowl and tiny spoon. You’re right; it’s all in the technique!

    Like

    • redosue August 26, 2015 / 6:56 am

      I’m trying very hard to rein in this sweet tooth as, at this age, the calories resulting from caving to the desire do not burn off the way they used to. One thing I’m attempting is the small portion approach but then I rationalize to myself “Oh, it was so tiny, you can have another serving.”

      Liked by 1 person

  3. parulthakur24 August 26, 2015 / 12:41 am

    Ha ha! That was so fun to read. I too have a sweet tooth and it gets so hard to resist. great post!

    Like

    • redosue August 26, 2015 / 6:54 am

      In July I went 3 weeks w/out dessert and then we went on vacation and all hell broke loose. Now I’ve got to start all over again.

      Liked by 1 person

  4. cheergerm August 26, 2015 / 2:22 am

    Only hidden behind peas? In my household, it would already have been eaten. Good luck! 😁

    Like

    • redosue August 26, 2015 / 6:53 am

      It’s a BIG bag of peas! BTW, the frangipane was stupendously delicious and is gone. I ate the last piece last night – without ice cream.

      Liked by 1 person

      • cheergerm August 26, 2015 / 5:34 pm

        Ha, the Great Wall of Peas. So glad you enjoyed the frangipane. It’s a goodie!

        Liked by 1 person

  5. Shailaja/ The Moving Quill August 26, 2015 / 11:51 am

    Can I just say you have me craving for a tub of ice cream right now?! That description of the spoonful, being teased by your tongue is arousing all kinds of emotions. Oh dammit!

    Liked by 1 person

    • redosue August 26, 2015 / 6:42 pm

      There is NOTHING so tempting to me as a tub of ice cream. It takes a heckuva lot of willpower to not eat the whole thing in one go. I hope YOU were able to overcome temptation, Shailaja!

      Like

  6. exiledprospero August 26, 2015 / 12:22 pm

    Very interesting, Sue. I have grappled with this intractable problem too. My solution is to cut a 5 gram piece of cacao butter (it comes in a block) and have it, using an alternating bites techniques, with 7 grams of dried fruit (dates, yacon, mango, et cetera).

    This amount of sweetness, however modest, is required to keep me lucid. And the fat content of the cacoa butter works wonders from the point of view of satiety, thereby making a small amount of sugar go a very long way.

    Without a requisite amount of after-dinner sweetness, I am not as congenial as one might expect an exiled lunatic to be.

    Liked by 1 person

    • redosue August 26, 2015 / 6:39 pm

      I agree. Dinner w/out dessert is incomplete. Your approach sounds deliciously restrained and I admire your approach. I am, however, a genuine addict and the only measure I can take that works is complete abstinence. So far this hasn’t worked either, as I regularly fall of the no-sugar wagon.

      Like

  7. Andrea Stephenson August 26, 2015 / 4:05 pm

    Wonderful description, not only of eating ice cream, but of the whole temptation / savouring / being in the moment with it!

    Like

    • redosue August 26, 2015 / 6:37 pm

      I just ate my evening bowl. I swore all day I wouldn’t but then…

      Liked by 1 person

    • redosue August 27, 2015 / 9:58 am

      In a household of addicts, the demand is never ending. i wish you luck with your sweet tooth!

      Like

  8. c2avilez August 30, 2015 / 7:58 pm

    I so relate to this, right down to eating ice cream with a tiny spoon. I love getting to the end when the ice cream is just a little melted and oh, so creamy!

    Ice cream doesn’t last around here. Once, because I wanted that peppermint ice cream to be there when I wanted it, I wrote in Sharpie – Mom’s ice cream. Keep out! Surprisingly, it actually worked!

    Liked by 1 person

    • redosue August 31, 2015 / 9:46 am

      Thanks for the excellent suggestion! Large, black sharpie now added to the school supplies we are buying this week!

      Like

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